The proof isn’t with me. Still, I know they’re trying to cheat on me.” Cheaters are known for knowing a lot. Cheating seems commonplace to us. It seems obvious we’re being cheated on. This can’t be the reason for our relationship problems.
When it comes to cheating, we sometimes get it wrong. But we do it all the time too. We may lose all sense of sensibility if we catch a cheater. We may lose all logical thinking and rationality.
Cheaters can become shells of their former selves because of suspicion of cheating. They wrestle with the possibilities of the unknown because they are obsessed with the truth.
What does this mean to me? It means that I have been cheated. I have also been tricked. I have inflicted the pain. My experience includes the anguish of discovering you’re being cheated on by someone you’re with. I possess an excellent understanding of the art of cheating based on my experience. My method of playing is cheating if there is cheating on the cards.
Infidelity begins the moment a person crosses the line. Everyone has their way of doing things, which is unfortunate for most people. Every cheating act is different. There are various ways one person cheats on another and different durations. However, the rules almost always remain the same:
It sounds as if these rules were intended. It may be the case for some serial cheaters. An acquaintance of mine ensured I followed each direction, so he could ‘trust’ our affair. He could be sure his girlfriend and my boyfriend wouldn’t discover it.
There are no different rules for those who let one moment spiral out of control. Instead of seeking thrills, you follow them out of desperation.
In the same way that criminals know the laws, cheaters know which rules to break. In what ways? Cheaters are as likely to be caught in the act with money in the bank. It’s impossible to back up drastic measures without significant suspicion, especially if no evidence is available. For instance, hidden cameras might be a good idea.
To help you understand why your partner might cheat on you, I want to give you some rules to follow. There is no clear-cut definition of cheating. The truth is twisted, trust is challenged, and devastation follows even after the relationship has ended.
There is something inconsistent about cheating. Something I regretted having perfected so many years ago. My previous activities can’t be scattered, and the aggravation I have caused can’t be changed. Despite that, my experience and insight may prevent someone from further suffering.
The act of undetectable cheating is the same as committing a crime. The DNA you leave behind cannot be erased. Never let anyone doubt your innocence. Raising an eyebrow at your behaviour is a clear sign that you have violated the rule. I’ve only known Andrew to cheat on me once, and he’s been, my first boyfriend. It’s not like he was a good keeper of this rule. I and those who loved me were rife with suspicions of him.
Everywhere you looked, there were names. Stories included the terms of girls. He had picked out jewellery for me with the help of girls. Ladies who professed to be passing on to meet me, I never heard their names tossed around like cheese on pasta, but they never did. Casually, naturally, and without suspicion.
The names weren’t the problem. The stories weren’t either. There was something wrong with the tone. After saying their words, he shifted his expression from matter of fact to pure joy.
He cared too much about these people. They weren’t just names. He could never have a girlfriend without caring about these people so much. The biggest mistake was letting me get to know him well enough to know when something changed. A change in his voice. An attitude shift. A sharper focus on details.
He is said to have cheated on me by one of his friends. Many witnesses witnessed Andrew’s infidelity. There was no discernment in him as a seasoned cheater would. There was no respect for rules in him.
They will make sure there are no witnesses if they don’t want to get caught. There will be no DNA. It will be no physical evidence left behind. It will be impossible to answer any questions.
Cheating is like searching for a tough to find a little item for the cheater. There is no proof sometimes. The only evidence you have is a clue. That’s sufficient evidence sometimes.
It’s common for cheaters to claim they never intended to be caught. However, they are lying. They hope someone will see them and relieve their guilt by leaving clues about their actions. At times, they are aware of their actions. It isn’t always that simple.
Who is that man with the rules I mentioned earlier? He was crippled by guilt when I had an affair with him. Once the responsibility became too much, he left clues everywhere. Our secrets dripped behind him everywhere he went as if he were a broken rubbish bag.
It was he who proposed the affair to me. I was offered a handshake deal in which we could continue our physical relationship without our partners knowing about it. This was acceptable to me.
As you can imagine, I was surprised when his girlfriend found our messages on his phone while he was away. She could have read our exchanges on his computer if he had left his Facebook account open. Likewise, the time he bought me a bracelet with her credit card.
The reason he did it was clear to me. We realized we couldn’t win if we continued our affair, and we both realized we couldn’t win if we continued it. I realized it would have been easier to break things off with me.
Those who are guilty of cheating, and want to change, will allow you to catch them. They will rarely do so in the act of adultery. If they don’t want you to do business with them, you won’t be allowed to enter their office. Nevertheless, if they are trying to get caught, you will come close to it.
The cheat must master the art of lying. I was being able to tell a convincing lie and keep all your lies straight. I will not lie by omission but by failing to clarify my meaning. Cheaters need to master this rule. It’s pointless to be deceptive unless all your ducks are in a row.
Despite Andrew’s best efforts, he couldn’t maintain order. I once heard from him that he and his friends were out. I have informed of something totally unique a couple of days after the fact. They went to better places. They had an alternate encounter. It was different then. They zeroed in on various things. He was unable to stay aware of his falsehoods.
It is sensible to expect that this is self-evident. You think you’re the one who’s wrong when you hear the stories for the first time. Your memory is questioned. There’s no way you can keep it straight. Remember your lies and don’t let them be twisted; it must be the lesson the cheat-ee learns.
A cheater often manipulates your memory. You will be accused of telling a lie incorrectly when they get it wrong. Cheating is perfectly illustrated in films. The actors pat you on the back and reassure you.
A cheater’s worst enemy is the question. It gets worse for them as you ask more questions. Ink is another enemy. Permanently inking their confessions makes them retrievable in the future. They can be retrieved by text message, email, or by an old-fashioned notebook. Ink is the cheater’s worst enemy.
Cheating or skirting the lines, ‘which one is it?’, the cheater will ask. Even though cheating seems like a black or white issue, in which you either cheat or don’t, there are many grey areas. In this grey area, emotional cheating falls. Emotional cheating falls outside the conventional definition of cheating. Flirting is part of this.
Inappropriate looks are also included. Cheating is discussed but not followed through on. Messaging inappropriately would upset your partner. Relationships are tested in the grey area. However, if you don’t define black and white early on in a relationship, you can fall victim to it sooner than you think.
Cheating is defined differently by each couple. The reason why many couples fail is that they don’t determine what cheating in their relationship means. Michael chastised Julia for kissing another girl when she was dating him. They were playing a game. It was supposed to be cheating, but Michael thought otherwise. They parted ways immediately. She was encouraged to kiss whatever girls she wanted by her new boyfriend after she had two boyfriends. The cheater needs to learn to exploit the technical aspects of the relationship.
Their awareness of wrong and right is acute, and they will always err on the side of evil. A cheater will exploit your trust if your relationship expectations aren’t clear. A cheater’s assumptions are always used against them when cheating in a relationship.
Cheaters must have a reason for cheating. Cheaters must have a reason for cheating. Forgiven cheaters should not be excused from cheating. However, cheating rarely happens without explanation. Motivations are almost as important as rules when it comes to cheating. It is necessary to have a reason for cheating before you begin. Cheaters often justify their behaviour, for this reason, fueling their continuous affair.
A cheater is usually seen as a wrong person who has no feelings and, therefore, cheats. But cheaters typically do so because they feel that something is wrong with them. They find something about their lives, your lives, and the combined lives with you uncomfortable.
Here are some possible reasons that someone would cheat (the motive):
I mentioned earlier that catching a cheater is nearly impossible. The power of knowledge is what you now have, which most don’t. Cheaters understand how they think, how they move, why they cheat, and some of the methods they employ. If I were to explain all the how I could write an article daily for the next decade)
The only way to catch them is to ask them. What are you doing wrong? Has anyone else been with you? I have never been asked straightforwardly, nor have I felt sufficiently able to stand up to the individual who I suspected was grimy I could save time, energy, and excruciating anxiety by asking outright.
We shouldn’t worry about what the other person thinks. We don’t need to appear worried or clingy. We ask them because communication is the key to healthy relationships. Lie or not, it’s their fault. It’s a common occurrence. Just keep in mind that they’re natural rule-followers. You don’t have to do that, however.
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